Anxiety · Berlin · Decluttering · Mental Illness · Minimalism · Nature · New Year's Resolutions · Photography · Stress · Teaching · Travelling · Veganism · Winter · Writing · Zero Waste

January in Review.

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My priority for January was Energy. I focused on pushing myself to show up with energy and enthusiasm every day of the month, which helped me to power through the cold and dark weeks in Berlin. I have often found this to be the hardest month of the year, and I’m sure I’m not alone in that, but having a value such as Energy to aspire to for the month helped me focus on making the best start to 2018 that I could.

Beginning the year on the right foot was important for me, so I pared down the final few unnecessary belongings I had brought with me from Japan, and then worked hard to keep our new home organised and clutter-free. I cut down the number of sites and blogs I visit online by unsubscribing from mailing lists, removing bookmarks, and using a blocksite add-on. In February, I want to consider how I choose to spend my time online, and whether it can be better spent elsewhere (pretty sure I can guess the answer to that already).

It was essential for me to develop a healthy sleep routine in preparation for starting at my new job, and now I find myself waking up every morning naturally, just before my alarm is due to go off. On top of this, I challenged myself to get some fresh air and exercise every single day this month, as well as to push ahead with my hula-hooping core work indoors, both of which I achieved. Of course, I also kept up my vegan lifestyle through January.

Taken at Charlottenburg Palace Gardens and Grunewald, Berlin.

Finally, I also worked incredibly hard at staying in the moment, rejecting ruminating on the past or worrying about the future as much as I could. Bringing awareness and intention to this habit helped me to go a long way towards breaking it. In the end, I didn’t manage to get to the swimming pool like I planned, because I decided it was not a financial priority for January, but I did at least get round to buying a swimming costume in the right size, which is a start.

4th February 2018.

Anxiety · Berlin · Mental Illness · Nature · New Year's Resolutions · Photography · Winter · Writing

Charlottenburg Palace, Berlin.

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Berlin in winter is cold, grey, still and quiet.

There are sheets of ice across the lake in the gardens of Charlottenburg Palace, sparrows blaze their calls in the thornbushes, empty mussel shells litter the burrow of an otter or water vole, and a pair of white swans break the glassy surface of the water as they glide under a wrought-iron bridge.

January is coming to an end, and the first month of the new year is almost over. We are growing hyacinths in clay pots on the windowsill, and fresh-cut tulips splash colour in a vase. The lamps are on throughout the day in an attempt to replace the sun.

I have started teaching. It has only been two weeks, but it feels as though I have worked here much longer. We wake in darkness, I ride the train in darkness, there is a deep purple light on the horizon as I enter the school building, and it is dark again when I leave. It snows often, raining huge flakes that send a tumult of joy through the corridors, but it does not last.

We are very happy here. We spend our weekends exploring natural spaces, and treading cobbled streets intersecting neighbourhoods that bridge East and West. Our residence status here is secure, and Dillon has another publication imminent. We are concentrating on saving, on strengthening, and on cherishing one another. I worry less, and experience more.

21st January 2018.

Animals · Anxiety · Berlin · Decluttering · Fashion · Japan · Mental Illness · Minimalism · New Year's Resolutions · Osaka · Overseas · Recovery · Stress · Travelling · Veganism · Visas · Zero Waste

October ’17 Life Update: Lots has been going on!

I’ve let updating my blog slip, which I always hate. I’m one of those people who prefers to do something properly or not at all. I can’t stand the idea of having unfinished projects or loose ends still to be worked on, which means I often start something with a burst of energy and then get rid of it completely when I can’t keep up that level of commitment. I have high expectations of myself and I’m a perfectionist on top of that (“The perfectionist’s perfectionist” is how I described it to someone who asked recently). It’s a double-edged sword, because I am known to be efficient, effective and highly productive, but ultimately I can’t deny that it is driven by my faulty mental wiring that simply will not allow me to be anything other than that.

Sometimes that itch of feeling myself to be not being good enough makes me think that I would rather delete this blog entirely than allow myself a few weeks off before writing a new post. I have definitely deleted multiple blogs and archived posts when I used to be on social media, and even before then I used to rip up diaries a page at a time when I was in school, because I couldn’t bear the idea that I would have to keep something around me where I had made a mistake on one page. Obsessive-compulsive disorder is a wasteful condition, not just environmentally but the amount of wasteful energy it forces one to waste on stress and anxiety about literally anything it can. So I’m not going to apologise for this lull, because I think instead I need to give myself a break (“give myself grace”, as one of my favourite YouTubers, Allyson Faber, likes to say), and just do the best that I can in the circumstances.

Here’s what has been going on with me lately:

We have now booked our flights to Germany. We will be leaving Osaka in mid-December, and I have decided to hand in my notice earlier than I had previously intended, so that we will have time in November to visit Kyoto and Nara, and so I can generally have a bit of a rest before I start my new job in Berlin in January. We have done a lot of the administrative work for our move now, and Dillon has received his visa, so all we need to do now is to organise our accommodation in Berlin, which we are planning to do over the coming week.

Dillon and I have been making real progress with our transition to zero waste. We have cut down on the amount of plastic we consume by cutting out plastic bottles as much as is possible, and buying fruit fresh rather than pre-cut. We have set up four recycling stations in our storage closet: plastic bottles, glass and metals; other plastics; paper and cardboard; and textile recycling. The only waste going into our kitchen bin now is food waste, as we are not currently in the position to set up a composting station. We are excited to begin vermicomposting in Berlin.

I am considering setting up a YouTube channel alongisde this blog, where I would focus on topics including minimalism, veganism, zero waste and sustainable living. I have an idea to adapt Courtney Carver’s Project 333 into something like a Project 12-21 as one of my New Year’s resolutions for 2018, which I would like to revolve around long-term ethical choices and sustainable changes in my life. I have been learning a great deal about the fast fashion industry, and thinking about changes I want to make in order for my life to reflect my values towards these issues.

Something I did not expect when I read ‘The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up’ by Marie Kondo, and then began listening to the weekly Minimalists podcast, was how open and flexible I would become to making significant and sustained change in my life. Minimalism led me to veganism, which got me interested in zero waste, which began forcing me to ask questions about sustainable consumption, and now I am learning more about environmental ethics and thinking about plans for the future that include some kind of project to help learning disabled children learn or traumatised children recover through learning centred around caring for animals.


I am glad to be moving to Germany soon so that we can be closer to our family. If you are inclined to do so, please keep my mum in your thoughts, as she is currently resting and recovering, and I hope I am able to talk to her on Skype soon xx

Berlin · Day Trip · Japan · Nature · Osaka · Overseas · Photography · Teaching · Travelling

Summer Vacation, Nagai Botanical Garden, and Big News!

I’ve taken a break from blogging over my summer vacation, but I’ve just completed my prep week back at work, and the Autumn term begins tomorrow, so I’m going back to weekly updates from today.

Both Dillon and I had a bad cold over the summer, so we spent the first few days of my holiday resting and getting over our illness. We went for a walk around one of the local shopping malls, Namba Parks, and sat up on the rooftop garden admiring Osaka from above. Something I really like about this city is that despite it being so busy and there being countless things to do, there are lots of quiet spaces interspersed throughout it, where it stays peaceful and you can enjoy some peace and quiet. For my 26th birthday we went bowling at Round 1 in Namba, where I did surprisingly well considering there were no bumpers, and the Japanese guys in the alley next to us who were on their twentieth game applauded Dillon’s strikes and my spares! We also went out for soy burgers (this Friday marked one month since Dillon and I adopted a wholly plant-based diet). We went back to Round 1 later in the holiday to play pool, and we also visited an amusement park in Misaki Koen, outside of Osaka on the coastline.

This week at work was a preparation week, spent mostly in meetings. I met a new student who will be joining some of the classes I teach and did some assessment with work him. I also had some time to complete my planning and resourcing for the new term. Thursday and Friday were spent in a workshop focusing on teaching the Primary Years Programme (PYP) for the IB. The lady who ran it reminded me a lot of my PGCE tutors and I was pleasantly surprised at how interesting and helpful the workshop was – it’s always great to come away from something like that feeling as though I’ve learned lots of new things.

Today we went to Nagai Botanical Garden, an incredible natural space in the centre of the city, full of flowers, herbs, bamboo trees and areas of ancient forest. We saw turtles, huge koi and other fish in the lake, dragonflies, butterflies, and even some Japanese beetles in the roses.

I also have some big news! Dillon and I have wanted to move to Europe for some time, and once term broke up in July, I had some time to put together application materials to submit, and I saw an advertisement for a position similar to a SENCO (Special Educational Needs Co-Ordinator), which is a role I always aspired to take up in Britain, had our circumstances been different. The position is at another international school, this time in Berlin. As well as leading SEN provision for the Primary School, I will have some responsibility for EAL support. The job starts in January, so Dillon and I will be leaving Osaka in December and travelling to Germany. The school are covering my flight and our relocation costs, and we have been put in touch with their relocation service, which is brilliant and very reassuring. Until then, our plan now is to enjoy our last few months in Japan as much as we can, before beginning our next chapter in Berlin!

(It is also our second wedding anniversary today, and next week will mark three years since Dillon and I met in York for the first time ♥)